On his way to chase after Ji Yan, Lu Yichen’s head was in a complete mess, because what Zhou Ke said was true, those shoes were indeed an imitation.
He really bought Ji Yan a pair of fake shoes.
The afternoon sun was scorching hot but Lu Yichen still strode forward, running as fast as he could, his hair was getting wet with sweat, his shirt already damp yet his heart felt cold.
Just now, Ji Yan’s icy look replayed in his mind over and over again, making him unable to feel the heat from this hot summer day.
He doesn’t know how long it took for him to catch up with the man.
Finally he could see Ji Yan’s thin figure wobbling alongside the road, his pace seemed unusually heavy.
Lu Yichen, with a tight heart, reached out to hold him, panting his name:” Brother Yan.”
Ji Yan had been absent-minded up until that moment. He turned around slowly, staring at him in a daze, frowning, he asked: “What are you doing here?”
“Brother Yan, are you… angry?” Lu Yichen asked as he tried to gauge Ji Yan’s expression.
But, his face showed nothing, neither joy nor anger.
“No, what should I be angry about?” Ji Yan smiled and gently bent down.
Lu Yichen breathed a sigh of relief, revealing a childlike smile: “Brother Yan, it would be great if you were not angry, the thing about the shoes is that I actually…” his voice trailed off as he watched Ji Yan take them off.
Ji Yan took off his shoes and slowly got up. He gave them back to Lu Yichen and said with a smile: “Do you know? This is my first time wearing a pair of fake shoes.”
Lu Yichen held the shoes dumbly, watching Ji Yan turn around and walk forward with a smile. He was barefoot, yet as he kept on walking, he didn’t show any discomfort with his back stubbornly straighten up.
Ji Yan was angry, even though he was smiling, he most certainly was angry.
Lu Yichen caught up to him, stretched his hand and tried to hold the man again, but he was pushed away.
“Brother Yan, put your shoes on, the ground is hard, you will hurt yourself!”
“I don’t wear fake shoes” Ji Yan said as he continued walking forward.
Lu Yichen stared at his red feet. Brother Yan’s feet are very good-looking and he likes to play with them in his hands. His legs are also beautiful, white and tender smooth, the blue blood vessels can be clearly seen after a vigorous exercise.
Thinking of this, Lu Yichen’s eyes became a little hazy. He strode forward and hugged Ji Yan in his arms, buried his head in his neck, and as rubbed it there, he said with a soft voice: “Brother Yan, I was wrong.”
Every time Ji Yan was angry with him, Lu Yichen used this method to coax him et get back on his good side.
But this time seemed different.
Ji Yan touched Lu Yichen’s head and whispered: “All right, let go. You don’t have to apologize. I’m not angry.”
“Really?” Lu Yichen said and quickly squatted down and held Ji Yan’s ankle: “Brother Yan, I will help you put your shoes back on.”
Ji Yan looked down at Lu Yichen. The young man was drenched in sweat and had a very sincere expression on his face.
This innocent and harmless look made Ji Yan’s heart shook for a bit but he still broke away from Lu Yichen’s hand, kicked off the pair of shoes, and took two steps back: “I said, I’m not going to wear them.”
Ji Yan turned around and sighed softly. Lu Yichen looked just like a puppy but why are other people’s puppies small milk dogs while his was a silly one? Oh no! More like a jackass, a scumbag!
Lu Yichen lowered his head, with a face full of grievances. He realized that Brother Yan was truly angry this time. For a moment, he felt completely at a loss.
Ji Yan continued on his way. Fortunately, the road underneath his feet was a sandy road rather than the more common asphalt one; otherwise his poor sole feet would definitely be roasted by now.
It is not that Ji Yan was not afraid of pain, but whether it is the heat on the ground or the hard stones, all of them hurt, but none of them felt as painful as the pain in his heart.
He let out a long breath, as long as he puts on those shoes, he will only feel humiliation and embarrassment.
Xia Jinian wore original shoes while his were knockoffs yet both were given to them by the same person.
The deep meaning behind was understood without much talking, Ji Yan knew in his heart what it meant.
Why did he want Lu Yichen to buy him that same pair of shoes?
He obviously knew the answer. It was to compare.
He was jealous, felt insecure and needed reassurance.
If Xia Jinian hadn’t gone to study abroad that year, two years ago, how could Lu Yichen be with him right now?
He felt like his confidence has been shaken. Ji Yan has never once before felt inferior to anyone. As a young girl would describe him, he is rich and handsome. He also has won many international culinary awards in his early twenties and you could honestly say that his achievements are outstanding among his peers.
Yet, after meeting Xia Jinian, everything changed.
Xia Jinian is younger than him, better-looking, he is well-bred and elegant. He also got a higher education and has won many music awards. Only he could make Ji Yan have an inferiority complex.
After all, although his family is well off, they weren’t as prestigious, he also comes from a single parent household, and he was raised by a single dad so he has no distinguished upbringing to speak of.
But what really made him feel so inferior was the fact that Lu Yichen would most definitely choose Xia Jinian over him.
And this is precisely why he felt like he couldn’t compare when it comes to Xia Jinian.
And so, he was unwilling to reconcile. He wanted Lu Yichen to love him, dote on him and spoil him more.
He also wanted him to forget Xia Jinian and erase him from his heart. Only then would he feel whole and not so shaken.
For that same reason, he asked for those shoes, he wanted Lu Yichen to give him even better ones than those he gave Xia Jinian.
However, knowing that Lu Yichen had no money, he couldn’t ask for a more expensive pair so he settled for the same pair of shoes.
But in the end, let alone similar ones, Lu Yichen gave him a pair of knockoffs.
The gap was too big, it made Ji Yan’s heart boil with anger, and he desperately wanted to vent it out but had no way to.
Even though he wanted to shout his heart out at Lu Yichen, he knew it would be in vain.
Holding the pair of shoes, Lu Yichen ran again to Ji Yan panting and begging: “Brother Yan, please listen to me, I’ll explain everything.”
“Okay, Explain” Ji Yan’s said with a steady tone without stopping.
Since he wants to explain, let him explain. Only after listening to his explanation can he get an idea about what went in his head.
“I… I have no money to buy you the originals, and you know that I have no money, so I thought to first buy … buy a fake…” Lu Yichen bowed his head and continued mumbling: “I want you to wait for me to make the necessary amount, I really am going to buy it for you…I have already contacted a place where I will be working starting today, and that’s why I told you I will be coming home late.”
“Okay, I get it” Ji Yan lowered his eyes and said: “Don’t try to persuade me to wear these shoes anymore, you be quiet for a while.”
Ji Yan ignored Lu Yichen and no longer talked to him.
Although he truly believed Lu Yichen’s explanation just now, he still didn’t have it in him to forgive him.
Is it all good now since he has apologized? If someone says sorry, you are obligated to take them back? Is being sorry enough?
In these past three years, Lu Yichen’s EQ did not grow in the slightest.
When buying those shoes for him, could he not think of what it meant to him? Couldn’t he be more considerate of him? Think of the humiliation and embarrassment brought by this kind of situation?
Ji Yan was fed up with this. He used to think he could teach him, help him grow and be more sensible, but now it just seems impossible.
Crossing the road, Ji Yan came to a shoe store, all while ignoring the strange looks thrown his way by some passers-by.
There was a trace of surprise in the shop’s owner’s eyes once he saw them, but he soon recovered and received the two politely with a smile.
Ji Yan picked out a pair of 5000 Yuan sneakers, which felt very suitable and comfortable on his feet.
“Does it look good?” Ji Yan looked up and asked a very depressed Lu Yichen.
“Yes, it looks good on you.”
“Then you buy it for me, pay for it.”
Lu Yichen’s throat tightened, his pale face looked awkward. He was really embarrassed.
He is really short of money. He doesn’t even have a 1000 Yuan on him right now.
Ji Yan raised his eyebrows at him, already guessing such an outcome. Then, he took out his own card and bought the shoes for himself, it was the first time in three years that he has bought such an expensive item.
For Lu Yichen sake, he had a fall out with his dad and cut ties with his family.
To be able to stay with him, he had to give up the offer letter of a five-star hotel, and instead opened a small shop that was barely doing fine.
He also didn’t mind living with him in a small house in the outskirt of the city and chose to lead a frugal life.
Now thinking about it, he can’t help feeling stupid; giving up your career for love is plain stupid.
On the way back, the two remained quiet.
A long while later, Lu Yichen whispered: “Yan… Yan Ge, I will let you live the life you want in the future.”
“You can’t even afford a pair of shoes, what kind of life are you talking about?” Ji Yan said while stopping and looking straight at him.
Lu Yichen didn’t speak anymore, his face pale, eyes full of grievances; he looked so fragile as if he would break with a single touch.
Ji Yan knew that his words would hit him hard.
In fact, he has never wanted to hurt him like this. He didn’t ever want to see this kind of distorted look on his face.
All he actually ever wanted was to hold him in his arms and love him.
But this time he couldn’t do it.
It is difficult to recover from the year’s worth of hurt feelings and heartbreak.
“Did you know?” Ji Yan said: “On the night of our first time together, you called Xia Jinian’s name.”
Lu Yichen’s eyes widened in shock.
Ji Yan again added: “I have kept this in my heart for the past three years.”
“Brother Yan, I didn’t know. I had too much to drink that night, and I was out of my mind, I didn’t know anything” Lu Yichen said as he hurriedly tried to hug Ji Yan, but was pushed away:” We are breaking up, and this time, it is final.”
 Yan Ge: Brother Yan
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